James Hillman, in “The Soul’s Code” writes We dull
our lives by the way we conceive them. We have stopped imagining them with any
sort of romance, any fictional flair. In the rest of his book, James
explores how it would be to conceive life according to the Myth of Er.
In this myth, our souls, before our births, choose our body,
our parents, the place and time of our birth and the conditions in which we are
to live – essentially all the circumstances that suited the soul and that, as
the myth says, “belongs to its necessity”. In the process of arrival, however,
we forget all that took place and believe that we came empty into the world. The things that "happen" to us,
beyond nature and nurture, beyond our genetics and our social conditioning, may
be the "call" to find our own character and our own destiny.
Whilst I confess that I cannot take this myth literally, I
find it incredibly helpful to conceive my life in this way. When things “happen” as they do - the loss of
a baby, the loss of a lover, the so-called “chance meeting” with someone who
subsequently has an important part to play in my life – then rather than wail “why
me?”, instead I choose to think of these happenings as something that maybe my
soul has chosen – and my task to learn the most I can from them. Are these things sent to prod me into remembering
who I really am?
The most heartwarming things can happen by conceiving of
life in this way. When my friend gave
birth to her delightful baby son, Charlie,
he was born with a very rare condition in which his organs- heart lung spleen
etc - were reversed, on the right side of his body; and some of his plumbing
was not as it should be. It was not clear how well he would survive
this condition. His parents were
distraught, and hardly able to look at him or confront the possibility of his
early death. Certainly time for a “why
us?” cry to the universe. After hearing of the Myth of Er, they pondered the
significance of Charlie consciously chosing the circumstances of his birth and them
as his particular parents – and what he - and they - were destined to learn
from this. From this moment on, instead of turning away and hardly being able
to bear being with Charlie in case he might die, they considered him a special
gift and cherished him, loved him and made the most of every moment. Yes, this
story does have a happy ending - Charlie – my godchild- is well and thriving
and growing up to be a delightful and open person.
It must be the day for thinking of people called James, as I
cannot finish this off without acknowledging another of my inspirations - James
Roose Evan, who I have been privileged to meet at one of his wonderful
workshops on ritual. James is a theatre director, priest, writer, and many
other things, and is currently burning brightly with his production of Hugh Whitmore’s “The
Best of Friends”. In his book “Inner
Journey, Outer Journey” James writes
"Unless we believe that each one of us is special,
then life indeed is no more than a series of meaningless auditions for a remote
and uncaring director. Unless we can find meaning and significance in our lives
we shall be trapped in a ceaseless round of meaningless activity. Each one of
us has to find a centre within”
And thanks to James, I discovered the wonderful poems of
Cavafy – another person who understands the inner and outer journey:
ITHAKA
As you set out for Ithaka
hope your road is a long one,
full of adventure, full of discovery.
Laistrygonians, Cyclops,
angry Poseidon - don't be afraid of them:
you'll never find things like that one on your way
as long as you keep your thoughts raised high,
as long as a rare excitement
stirs your spirit and your body.
Laistrygonians, Cyclops,
wild Poseidon - you won't encounter them
unless you bring them along inside your soul,
unless your soul sets them up in front of you.
Hope your road is a long one.
May there be many summer mornings when,
with what pleasure, what joy,
you enter harbours you're seeing for the first time;
may you stop at Phoenician trading stations
to buy fine things,
mother of pearl and coral, amber and ebony,
sensual perfumes of every kind -
as many sensual perfumes as you can;
and may you visit many Egyptian cities
to learn and go on learning from their scholars.
Keep Ithaka always in your mind.
Arriving there is what you're destined for.
But don't hurry the journey at all.
Better if it lasts for years,
so you're old by the time you reach the island,
wealthy with all you've gained on the way,
not expecting Ithaka to make you rich.
Ithaka gave you the marvellous journey.
Without her you wouldn't have set out.
She has nothing left to give you now.
And if you find her poor, Ithaka won't have fooled you.
Wise as you will have become, so full of experience,
you'll have understood by then what these Ithakas mean
Constantine P. Cavafy
